I have been amazed as I have talked to men throughout my life, how many of them carry around lasting scar tissue from their relationships with their father. i can relate because I had the same issue from age 12-37. As men, when we don’t receive the affirmation and love from our father’s that we need, especially as boys or young men, the effects of that can last a lifetime. In fact, most men I meet when I ask them about how their relationship is with their dad, they usually don’t answer, they look away, or they get a little choked up. In general, about 7 out of 10 men carry some deep wound from their father that is most likely still have an effect on them years later, and mostly with bad consequences. Men simply have a hard time processing the pain that can come from a bad, distant, neglectful, non-existent or abusive relationship with their father. In most cases, including my own experience, we simply try to anesthetize the pain, or we run from it using anything we can to shield us from the deep wound. It could be drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, or anything else that gives us a temporary “high” and helps us to feel better about ourselves no matter how fleeting that feeling is.
It is rare that men are willing to take the time to do deep introspection and really acknowledge the pain they feel and admit they need help. In my case, i tried running for 25 years, until one day I got tired of running and acknowledged how much I needed help. How about you? Are you tired of running? Are you looking for someone to help you find solutions to what ails you? Are you ready to forgive your Father? Let’s talk about it. Everyone has a story and every story matters. I found out the greatest news ever. No matter how much my Father had failed, I had a heavenly Father who loved me so much that He sent His Son to die for my sins and to teach me how to forgive and begin my life with new purpose and clarity. God knows your pain and He wants to heal you. He calls us chosen in Ephesians 1:4-6 “For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. Let’s discuss it. Send me a message at DougHallmedia.com/wounds-of-our-fathers.